Bad Laundry Day

Shadows of man all over –
the floors, in the closet
I left open to exorcize him,
yet he’s out there, in your love.
But he’s no ghost, not lost
as this transparent stain
on my clothes. I can’t wash so
I do my hair, I think I’m pretty
enough to turn off the creeping
spirit, but no – he’s taken over.
Within your eyes, he came
divine, like an idol, or a bust –
all roads lead to his offerings.
I wash my skirts again, having
lost, in every manner he is gone.
Where he homes I cannot haunt,
and my girly hands fade my touch.

Post-Construction #1

(for C.)

Sister – they built you in a fist
bundling pain, hometown, sneers, et etcetera,
before you woke in the empty rooms of body.
Grappling is what the fist does best: a state.
And the best that history does is break
into sticks. Here, is a stick for your hometown, halved.
There, is a recombination pattern in those stories:
deep within your hair ends the axioms
of loss, losing definition. Grasp
the space adjacent to your lulling body,
connecting the logic of past and future
which must slip, and grow away from your unclasped fingers.

Parallel Truths (20/04/2019)

"My brother and my sister don't speak to me / but I don't blame them"

- James Blake, "I Never Learnt To Share" (2011)

Alternatives (Schrödinger, 1952)
are another way of saying loss:
how Little Sis cried when Mom
reconsidered her own abortion;
Big Sis forgets to miscarry Mom;
a stranger owns my blog domain.
The wrong timeline a synonym to
this poem, a symptom of anomaly.

Distancing

Day 1: Throw all these words out of a window.
Day 4: The Sky remains blue, and not to be hugged.
Day 9: Pouring heart out, into sink. Peeling redness.
Day 17: Began counting despite lack of fingers.
Day 25: Began counting all hugs that were missed.
Day 31: Thinking of us Lesbians; and everyone erased.
Day 59: We failed in realizing how nothing comes to pass.
Day 100: Zeroes gaping, curved and sharp, fitting.
Day 219: What if there was no alternative? No vaccine for touch?
Day 370: Began projecting futures off the tips of raised hairs.
Day 541: I’ve tasted wet lips once, long before my lips had hangnails.
Day 712: Numbers, Skies, Zeroes, Hair on my lips and touchy, touching.
Day 713: Nights becomes taut and I didn’t even get to touch them.

Day *11: There is no longer a pandemic that failed to touch everyone.

Day 2*6*: I lost you in writing: you too, were out of the window, out of touch.

Anxiety #1

, .
[,]…
[; ? ; ?; ;?]
[; ?; ; !]

,,,!,!,,!,!!,!,!,!!!!,,,!!!!!!,,,!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!, , !!!!! ,
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!![;;;;;;;;;;;;;]!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

,!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
,!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
,!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ,!!!!!!!!!!
, , , , , , ,,,,,,,,,,, ; ; ; ; ; ; !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
[…,,,,],,,,,,, , , ! , ! , , , , , ! ! ! !
! !!!!!

!!! !! !!!…!!!!!……!!!!!!!… , , , , , , , , , , [.] , ,! , ,

Lack of Dawn

How we used to breathe starlight,
because I imagined there were no
clouds overhead: each cloud was
every exhalation of how this night
fails to end, how I keep dreaming
of a comet that would not fall
for me. Each dream counts the
number of breakfasts I’ve missed
and the number of swords I eat
during dinner; I counted ten
to completion, to end all wounds.
See: all I did was to feed myself
waiting for the sun to rise on set.

Suiteroom – Take 3

Microsoft Windows [Version 10.0.17134.829]
(c) 2018 Microsoft Corporation. All rights reserved.

C:\Users\Lune>darken puddle
‘darken puddle’ is not recognized as an internal or external command,
operable program or batch file.

C:\Users\Lune>add tears
‘add tears’ is not recognized as an internal or external command,
operable program or batch file.

C:\Users\Lune>dose check
‘dose check’ is not recognized as an internal or external command,
operable program or batch file.

C:\Users\Lune>hot tea
‘hot tea’ is not recognized as an internal or external command,
operable program or batch file.

C:\Users\Lune>stroll room
‘stroll room’ is not recognized as an internal or external command,
operable program or batch file.

C:\Users\Lune>d:

D:\>cd Google Drive\Poetry

D:\Google Drive\Poetry>type Suiteroom_3.txt